I Still Believe In Prayers - Part I

Photo credits: Virgin Mary Family

After graduating from a Catholic High School where we used to say prayers before and after each classes, I decided to attend a non-sectarian university where I finished my bachelor’s degree in Electrical Engineering. I thought I got tired of reciting the same prayers over and over again. 

During my college years, I had met friends from various religious denominations and went to their places of worship out of curiosity and courtesy especially if the one who was inviting me, happened to be my girlfriend. Let me say that I was soul searching in that period of my life, because I considered myself as a lost soul--trying to find answers and seek the truth about God!

Everyone who approached me claimed that their religion is the original and first one on Earth, and would recite verses from their own version of the Bible as if I didn’t know. Of course, none of them was able to convert me from my known faith - Roman Catholic, since birth. But is my faith to my own religion still intact? I had my doubts, and still searching… asking for questions, but am I asking the right ones?

After the Catholic Church was plagued with various sex scandals, I totally lost faith in its hierarchy and stayed away from its structured form of prayers except for the Lord’s Prayer. I also didn’t like the idea that they keep on changing the tunes when they sing it; and they have different tunes from one town to another. To me that only shows divisiveness among the congregation.

As written in an article on “Child Sex Abuse” in Wikipedia:

The Catholic sex abuse cases are a series of convictions, trials and investigations into allegations of sex crimes committed by Catholic priests and members of Roman Catholic orders against children as young as 3 years old with the majority between the ages of 11 and 14. Child sexual abuse is an umbrella term describing offenses in which an adult engages in sexual activity with a minor or exploits a minor for the purpose of sexual gratification. The American Psychiatric Association states that "children cannot consent to sexual activity with adults," and condemns any such action by an adult as "a criminal and immoral act which never can be considered normal or socially acceptable behavior." These cases included sodomy, and oral penetration, and there have been criminal prosecutions of the abusers and civil lawsuits against the church's dioceses and parishes. Many of the cases span several decades and are brought forward years after the abuse occurred.

In the Philippines where as of 2002 at least 85% of the population is Catholic, the revelations of sexual abuse by priests, including child sexual abuse, followed the United States' reporting in 2002. Of the Catholic sexual abuse cases in Latin America the most famous is arguably of the sexual scandal of Father Marcial Maciel, the leader of the Legion of Christ, a Roman Catholic congregation of pontifical right made up of priests and seminarians studying for the priesthood. This occurred after the Legion spent more than a decade denying allegations and criticizing the victims who claimed abuse. In Tanzania, Father Kit Cunningham together with three other priests were exposed as paedophiles after Cunningham's death. The abuse took place in the 1960s but was only publicly revealed in 2011, largely through a BBC documentary. Church officials and academics knowledgeable about the Third World Roman Catholic Church, say that sexual abuse by clergy is generally not discussed, and thus is difficult to measure. This may be due in part to the more hierarchical structure of the Church in Third World countries, the "psychological health" of clergy in those regions, and because third word media, legal systems and public culture are not as apt to thoroughly discuss sexual abuse.

I felt I was betrayed after reading this, and upon seeing the news on TV on almost a daily basis. If you were in my shoes, won’t you feel the same? 

Although I lost my faith in my religion, I did not lost my faith in God. I still pray, but from the heart and with the Holy Spirit. 

Ephesians 6:18 Int'l. Standard Version (2008) “Pray in the Spirit at all times with every kind of prayer and request. Likewise, be alert with your most diligent efforts and pray for all the saints.”

Somebody once told me that if Love reigns in my heart, chances are my prayers would be answered for God dwells among those who are in love. Somehow I could relate to this for after 43 long years, out of nowhere my childhood sweetheart and I found each other on Facebook. Back then, we loved each other without knowing what true love really was. We rekindled our old hearts and now we are about to get married. The people involved, the events that followed and the circumstances surrounding our relationship played an important role that led me to believe once more in the power of prayers.

But one may argue. How about those hungry and innocent children in some parts of Africa and in the Third World countries? Does your God simply ignore them even though they also have Love in their hearts? Does your God play favoritism just like your parents? These are questions I often ask myself as well. Honestly, I don’t really know the answer to those questions. Somebody might say, God works in many mysterious ways.

Most of the natural calamities such as hurricanes, floods, earthquakes and wildfires to name a few, were caused by mankind’s negligence, yet we blame God for every thing. Famine, wars and pestilence are never ending, and we thought somehow the government can do something to alleviate our pains and suffering if not totally put a stop to it.

Dream on my fellow deep thinkers and dreamers. As long as there is greed and corruption among us, we can never really live in peace and harmony. It’s all about the art of making Money and the art of War is just a synonym to it. We can only hope and pray that someday, somebody who we perceive as Allmighty and Omnipotent will intervene. Only then, will I hear the church bells ringing!